Org. XIV (OOC)

999, Mario 3D Land, KH 1.5, LPs, and attempting slightly to get through the rest of Digimon Savers...though that last one has kinda slipped away on me.

...Just so you all know, I went ahead and started a bit of the re-write. It's not even the first two whole pages of the original topic so far, and it's pretty long. Still it IS the beginning... and the prologue chapters still need to be decided on.

Also, there's nothing plot-wise stopping anybody from going ahead and doing something in Org.XIV. Just sayin'.

Awkward tonal shift. That is the problem. Otherwise I'd go ahead and post SOMETHING, but...well, it'd be an awkward shift from Al/Lance's fight.

So uh....What's going on right now? What I miss? How many death threats are on my head? >_>

Well, Lance is back, and he and Aleri are sparring now. Meanwhile, there's a fight going on in the Lost Woods, which is going to tie into the introduction of the new villain. And I'm working on the Org.XIV re-write, for which I'll need input from everybody who was present, since I doubt I'll be able to faithfully represent EVERYBODY'S writing. I mean, I can try to keep the script as unaltered as possible, but that's not a perfect solution.

As for progress, I've gotten through Siks's recruitment. As in, I'm up to page six in the original topic. The document itself is up to page seventeen. You wouldn't believe how much fleshing-out it requires, especially since I wanted to make it something that could potentially be read by somebody who doesn't know much - or anything at all - about Kingdom Hearts, and still be understandable. I mean, once everything's been established, it becomes much easier, since I don't have to describe tons of locations, people, creatures, weapons, powers, connections, concepts... basically, once the entire sum of our version of KH logic is exposited in the narrative, then it gets easier. That said, it's no easy task.

In particular, I'd like to get KH's cooperation, since Siks is heavily involved in the story thus far. Plus, I still want your opinions. There's going to be a prologue for Aleri and one for Xeromus, but should there be any others? You know, foreshadowing and all? Maybe inserting a few minor events here and there to give some meat to the story? I just added a brief scene where Xeromus informs Rexial on the status of the Recompletion Machine, and where his Heartless was last sighted, so he can convince Siks to help him track it down and capture it the next day.

I'll help out anyway I can. Just tell me what you need and I'll see what I can do.

I'd PM you the current version of the story to comb through and make any edits that concern Siks so that they feel more... you. Change his lines, alter his actions, give him more lines or thoughts... oh, but if you choose to make any drastic changes, I may have to change Rex's or Xeromus's responses to suit them. Feel free to add foreshadowing to the fact that he's got a wookie friend and a girlfriend out there somewhere, since it seems obvious from the beginning that he's not from Twilight Town, but instead a trained fighter.

I did something similar when writing Al's dream-flashback-sequence, with all the scenes that included Thalia. Admin wrote those scenes, and I fixed up Al's responses to suit him better, as he just doesn't quite talk or act the way he was written there. I mean, for the re-write, I try to stick to the original dialogue as much as I can to avoid making this happen, but in the end, I can't copy your style or the character's mannerisms.

So there'll be a PM in your box for you. It'll include the story from the beginning, but not the prologue or the additional narration I added for effect that I'll probably take out when I pick up steam.

Well, I'll help in anyway too.

I'm guessing now wouldn't be the best time to have Satoshi enter

No. No it wouldn't be.

So, Halcyon, what do you think about the idea of writing a prologue chapter for Lance? Just a little bit of writing to foreshadow his much-later introduction? Would it go with the other Prologues, at the start? Or do you think there's a point it would fit in with better?

And for that matter, does ANYBODY want to have a Prologue Chapter? I feel like I'm over-representing myself whenever I add anything pertaining to my characters and plots without doing anything for the others... but I can't do anything if nobody tells me what they want done.

Progress: GameFAQs Topic 1, Page 9, Introduction of Nexas, First Encounter with Seth, Capturing Rexial's Heartless.

Additional Scenes: Rexial's Chat with Xeromus, Rexial's Nightmare Encounter.

...Speaking of, I'll need to have a chat with XGeass about Seth's writing, so it seems more fitting. I'm sure he can think of better imagery than I can to describe somebody like Seth.

Personally, I don't feel that Dispatch has anything to write about...I mean, I've kinda established at this point that his past is totally irrelevant to...everything. I dunno, maybe if you want to add something about Daniel it could work, but beyond that, there's nothing to really be said on my end.

I might be willing to do I ne somewhere down the line, but I make no promises.

...I just had another weird idea.

What if there were a brief segment foreshadowing all of the important cast members by showing where they all are just before the story begins? Not telling anybody who they were, just giving them brief glimpses. Like the literary equivalent of an opening FMV. There would be obvious stuff, like Xeromus giving orders, and Aleri hanging out with Vita, or Rexial sitting around being bored, as well as more obscure things that weren't brought up yet, like Kuroyuki's training, or Xancel and Rexson hiding out while they plot their return.

I dunno, it just seemed like an interesting enough idea to bring up.

Ehhh, same thing kinda applies. Dispatch falls through some Dark Corridors, Aaron...um, points his gun at Heartless, and Daniel goes around murdering things with a chainsaw. Because he's awesome enough for a chainsaw.

Didn't he HAVE a chainsaw, which was woefully ineffective against the Heartless that ate his heart? And was it a deliberate reference to Sora's original weapon design, or just coincidence?

Oh, total coincidence. Like I said, a chainsaw was the nearest thing in his garage. And it was woefully ineffective because Heartless that aren't killed with a Keyblade just respawn. And he was distracted. And going up against Neoshadows with little to no combat experience.

But yes, he did have a chainsaw, yes it was woefully ineffective against Heartless, and it was a coincidence. Chainsaw just seemed like the most awesome thing to stab someone with when I first wrote that.

Also, he still has his chainsaw, just like Sora still has his wooden sword, Riku still has Soul Eater, Ven still has Terra's wooden sword, Roxas has his Struggle bat, et cetera.

Ok, what exactly have I missed?

Eh, Haar? Sora DIDN'T have his wooden sword, Riku had to give him one at Hollow Bastion. Roxas never really had a Struggle sword, it was just part of the simulation. And Ven's wooden Keyblade got snapped in half by Vanitas when he was demonstrating how much of a d*ck he was in front of Aqua. And before that, Ven left it behind in a chest.

Jury's still out on Riku's Soul Eater, since he hasn't had any reason to use it, but nothing suggests he can't, except his most recent development in 3D, which probably got rid of anything in him that was really AnsemSoD or Maleficent's work. Dunno why Daniel would carry around a chainsaw at this point, either, considering how heavy it is, but I'll assume he either doesn't care, takes full advantage of hammerspace, or leaves it in his room.


XGeass, how long have you been out? Well, most recent events in the story are as follows:

-Two years passed, as planned.
-Zane and Sally got married.
-Sylvia and Nick ran into Wayne and Necro in the Lost Woods: this is setting up for the next major villain.
-Aleri had a dream/flashback sequence to inform us what he's been doing all this time.
-Rexial and Thalia went to Station Tower to try and get Lance back, almost succeeding.
-Aleri showed up and helped out, and now Lance and Soren are back.
-Aleri and Lance started a sparring match.


As for what we're talking about, I've been doing some work re-writing the beginning of the story so it's up to our current standards, and to fix any canon errors or retcons. I'm currently up to the part where Seth first appears, so I'll want to discuss how to go about it with you, so it feels like your writing style instead of me poorly imitating it.

Let me know if there are any details in the story you'd like to have changed to better fit in, and if anybody wants to see the writing so far, just ask and I'll PM it to you.

Well I remember the wedding but everything after that is new. As for the things that need to be changed, for the most part I think I would need to change some of Seth’s dialogue about that one heartless with a broad sword( can’t remember the name) since I have other sentient Heartless who have a history with Seth.

Fine then, Roxas still had a random stick he picked up off the ground. And just because Riku tossed Sora a wooden sword doesn't mean Sora didn't have his. Riku just didn't know it.

Also, up until that point, Ven did still have the wooden Keyblade. My point is that just because a weapon becomes a Keyblade does not mean it disappears.

As far as the chainsaw itself, it's more like he summons his Keyblade, which then turns back into the chainsaw from whatever form it may have been in.

...So, uh, about the re-write... where should I post it? Should I make a topic for it under Org.XIV and post the writings there? Because once I get one of the Prologues done, I'll want to post it there.

Alright, I've been working on it, and I figure there should be a short Prologue Chapter for both Xorion and Sally, so we actually know what the hell their deal is without overloading their introductions with exposition. Xorion's was a very bare-bones intro, but I feel like there's no good way to explain it further, and it seems like a little Prologue would work perfectly for him. And Sally's story is just so conducive to having a Prologue that it would seem like a waste not to. Coincidentally, those two are BOTH Yusei's characters.

So.....how many people wanna kill me? >____>

Have I been holding up the RP?

I don't want to kill you, and I don't think you've been holding anything up. I don't THINK you have, I could be wrong.