TITAL 2: Why did It Take Me So Long To Do This?

<Seriously, Gstol... 1. It wasn't the turkey it was Minato's persona. 2. This is my warning to you: godmod and I'll ban you. I'm tired of having to deal with it.>

<*puts up hands defensively* OK, I won't, there's no need to pick up the Hammer. And as for No. 1, I thought it was the turkey, and I did say he was going for the turkey...>

Skife: *sees the person who slapped him is gone, but continues charging at the turkey, slashing at it*

<Question: Who exactly controls the turkey?>

<Tenhnicly i spawned it so i guess i do just kill it, it has served its purpose>

Blake Mueller needed a place to hide.

He had escaped his mother's after a hellish four months there. She had sent out some of her successful branwashed followers to hunt him down. He had gotten this far, he wasn't going to fail here. If he could get out of the city, he could start a new life. He could live in peace without the threat of murder looming like the dark cloud it was. Maybe he could have actual friends.

His hopes and dreams, however, were crushed by one single phrase.
"There's the wanker! GET 'IM!

Blake ran into an alley, and sloppily climbed a fence into the commercial district of the city. He had been spotted! He ran down a road and entered the outskirts of town... Where he tripped and fell. A follower of his mother, around 6'3 and 210 pounds, said,"Melena is very disappointed in you..." He nodded to the other followers, and they began kicking Blake with their steel-tipped boots. Blake was almost lifeless. The follower who began Blake's end pulled out a Torkarev TT-33 and shot him in the head, killing him and sending a mixture of bone and brain matter everywhere.

Blake however, felt alive, even though he was dead. Everything around him was black. He said,"I should have been DEAD! I had no friends! Nobody cared at all!" He felt a chill down his spine, and a voice say,"Lies."

Suddenly, Blake saw his adoptive parents. He said,"Mom! Dad! You've gotta help me,I--"

His mother and father did not hear him. His mother sobbed,"Why did he have to die?!?" His father sobbed alongside his mother. Blake said,"What the hell?" He suddenly saw a man wearing all black. He sighed and said with a British accent,"Looks like the war's gonna be longer..." The voice said,"You DID matter. You've affected your family, people you didn't even know... even a war. Now look carefully. This is five minutes after your death."
Blake then saw a girl... And the man who murdered him. He was shaking the girl and said,"Where are the other Stasis scientists?" The girl said in a monotone voice with little to none cadence,"What's Stasis?" The adversary shook her again and said,"LISTEN you android *****, we know you're one of them. Tell me where the others are, and I'll spare you."
"I truly don't know."
The man sighed, and pulled out a sword crackling with electricity. He said,"That's it, time to get short-circuited!" Everything paused. The voice said,"You are a wielder of the Ghost Arts. I'm going to send you there. Stop that man from killing her." He gave Blake a sword with glowing green foreign text on it. "You'll need this." He pushed him into a portal and said,"Good luck, and Godspeed."

The follower swung his blade towards the girl, and Blake stopped it with his blade, and declared a single word.

"Enough."

The follower said,"Who are you?" Blake smirked and slashed at him with the newfound blade. He said,"I'm that 'wanker' you killed just five minutes ago."

<Is this ok? Any problems?>

<That was a pretty badass introduction if i do say so myself. You'll be a great addition.>

Junior felt an odd sensation at the base of his mind, "Ghost Arts?" He whispered to himself sensing the new otherworldly power. He drew his scyth, "Mimi, make us a portal. We should investigate."

The silent girl nodded as pentagram lit up the ground consuming the pair.

---------------------------

A portal of flame opened behind Blake and the android girl. Junior stepped out of it followed by Mimi, "Just what exactly... is happening here?"

Blake, a bit shocked by the skeleton child said,"I dunno how to put it precisely. I died and I was revived." He then saw his murder swing the electrified sword towards Blake. In the blink of an eye, he had turned into a blue flame, and entered the blade. He muttered,"Ho...ly... S***."

<Look up Let's Play Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective. That's where I got the main ideas o the Ghost Arts: possession of objects. It's a very fun game. If you have an iPod touch or iPhone, I highly recommend it XD>

"Mimi, he's using electricity. It'd be best if you helped him handle this." Junior supplied.

Mimi nodded as she produced a slingshot, aiming it before launching a corrosive pellet at the attacker's face.

<Hmmm... So, he can come back from death? I looked at his Bio, and I don't think that was specifically listed among his skills... I mean, the problem with inhabiting a dead body is that it's dead. If your brains are decorating the pavement, your body isn't gonna be usable. However! I'll ignore that for two reasons. First, we don't exactly use complete realism here, and it's an excusable break from reality. Second, I think, as a sort of "awakening" moment for Blake, he could probably be given a free get-out-of-hell card.

In short, it's fine. My biggest gripe about it is that one paragraph where everything's all smashed together. One rule I use when writing, to avoid ever doing that, is to start a new paragraph whenever somebody else speaks. No two people can talk within one paragraph. Just a self-imposed rule that keeps things neat, for me.>

<On another note... Dammit, Haar! The second I saw Bob's post, I knew exactly how to finish things, then you had to send Sora running! I mean, c'mon, the solution is right there!>

Rexial did something rather unexpected this time: He flicked his sword around Jack, stopping Sora's attack, then deftly severed Jack's hand, snatching the Fragarach from him. He planted his foot firmly onto his defeated foe's back, holding the sword by the hilt towards Sora.

"Sora, grab on, NOW." He commanded, leaving only one second left for Sora to touch the magical sword that would protect them from all non-stab attacks... like explosions.

<And now, Rexial is standing there like an idiot, watching Sora risk his life running away, when five seconds (four, actually) is not enough to get away, thanks to the law of inertia. ...Wanna pretend that he just grabbed on anyway? Five(four) seconds is a stretch, even for getting into the ship and starting it up. I doubt he'd get away...>

Meanwhile, in the basement...

"Er, l-let's go through NOW. Hurry along!" Aleri blurted, hastily picking the two girls up and sprinting into the corridor, shutting it behind him, not wasting a millisecond.

"Sorry about that, but I got the weirdest sense of deja vu. And Jack's a sore loser, so I imagine he lost the fight and was about to try blowing us all up."

Blake was panicking. He didn't know what to do! He was beginning to think this "power" was just a fancy party trick.... Until he heard the voice say,"Think about breaking the sword and it shall happen." Blake did as the voice told him so. With a single thought, the blade snapped.

The corrosive pellet hit the man in the face, and a shard from the blade lodged its way into his eye. He let out a cry of pain. Blake returned into his body, and said,"Oh, HELL YEAH! Who's the wanker NOW, you filthy--" He stopped at what he saw.

Dark liquid began to foam in the man's mouth. He let out a roar. All of a sudden, he began to transform. He bloated to the size of one of those huge boulders one would move with the help of water at amusement parks. His skin looked as if it were stitched together. He pulled out a black pole from a hole in his stomach. He said in a distorted voice,"FOOLS! I am Scylla, Behemoth of Flesh! Prepare for your doom!"

<Since I can't post any YouTube videos for my first week here(-_-) search Spider-Man 64 OST Police Chopper Chase. That game had,IMO, one of the BEST OSTs of its console. Anything from this game should be played on loop in any future posts. My apologies for the issue.>

Junior smirked, slashing his scyth in mid-air as his demon took over, "You're not the only one with a hidden side, monster." He rushed forward and flipped forward launching himself into the air.

Mimi got beneath Junior and threw him with more force launching him and his scyth on a deadly path towards the beast.

< Time for me to cut in as well. All in all an excellent start Doctor, however I concur with Nebula's issue and advice, and will even offer this link to some general rules regarding dialogue http://www.dailywritingtips.com/dialogue-dos-and-donts/ for anyone-- including myself --to use. Other then that I only caught a few things the grammar nazi in me wants to point out but I try to keep him in check so as to not completely annoy everyone, even I'm not perfect.

P.S. The rest of you, I promise I will try to finish out the Lenox/Diryax/Naxwsh arc by tomorrow evening. >

<Thanks>

Skife: *aims for a kill blow on the turkey*

<Thanks for the link, Malakili!>

The girl looked at the bloated cretin, and she turned her right arm into an assault rifle. She began to shoot at the monster. After a whole clip of the 7.62 NATO ammunition was in Scylla, he staggered, and swung the black staff at the girl. Blake said,"I'm gonna try to possess his weapon!" With that statement, he jumped towards Scylla's staff, and possessed it. He said,"Everyone attack now!"

The girl finished reloading and said,"Reload complete. Clip type: 100 round 'Marauder' Clip. Ammunition reserves are at 300. Opening fire." She unleashed a flurry of bullets upon Scylla.

Junior's scyth collided at high speed slicing at Scylla's throat. As he landed, Mimi rejoined at his side readying to throw him again if they need another attack to bring down the beast.

<...Isn't posting a video here as simple as putting up a link? That's more efficient for us, anyway, since embedding the player makes the whole page take longer to load, and the music would cut out every time we went to a new page. Well, remember, while music can help with storytelling, heavy reliance is never good, unless the mood for something just has to be PERFECT, and only ONE piece of music could possibly convey it properly, and said music MUST be present.

Er, ignoring my rant, much improved. It's easier to read than your first post, and any minor errors are something that can be ignored most of the time, and you'll probably end up ironing them out in future posts.>

Aleri tumbled out of the corridor, sprawling onto the floor and conveniently sending the two girls flying through the air in just such a trajectory that they would land on the couch.

The corridor closing behind him, the Keyblader stood up and spat carpet dust from his mouth, lamenting his luck. Why did they get a safe landing, but he had to eat floor? "Bleeeeeh..." He groaned, trying to wipe the grime off his tongue. "Man, that's just no fair... Hey, are you two alright? Bo? Gaige?"

Gaige heard the explosion go off behind them as the two girls were pulled into the portal, "That was... close. Thanks, Aleri..." She looked at their new surrroundings, "Nice place you've got here..."

Bo dusted herself off and stood, "Yeah, we're fine. A lot better off than anything that was still inside anyways..."

-----------------------

Minato looked at the group then silently left the room, hoping that his brain would be able to recoup.

-----------------------

Jack slumped forward as he, Sora, and Rexial could be seen after the cloud of dust settled. He made no movement whatsoever.

< Your welcome, in truth there are some things in there even I need to work on. Also while it isn't grammatically incorrect the way you wrote it originally --provided that you make it clear when the speaker changes-- I (and I presume Nebula) find that it tends to flow easier when using a new paragraph to indicate the change in speaker. >

<P.S. Maybe for you Nebula, since you can't seem to see the embedded videos anyways >

<P.P.S Word of advice for when you can post videos: Always put a link under the video, lest you wish to face the wrath of Nebula. >

<

<P.P.S Word of advice for when you can post videos: Always put a link under the video, lest you wish to face the wrath of Nebula. >

>:D Muuuuhuhuhahahahaaaa!

Er, *ahem*. Actually, now I CAN see the embedded videos. However, this means my computer as to take time to load them... So, uh, yeah. >_< Now I just find it rude to use embedded videos, rather than impossible to view them. I definitely prefer links.

@PsychoticDoctor: Yeah, it's not so much about being correct as being fun to write and read. If it's terrible writing, it's not fun to read. If it could be handed in as a writing assignment and fit all criteria perfectly, that doesn't mean it was fun to write, or fun to read. And just because something written here may have been amazing, by more technical standards, it could be seen as amatuerish and uncultured, or something like that.

In short, have fun, don't get too crazy about correction, but keep an eye on the quality so we want to read it. Also, you may have noticed by now, by I have a tendency to explain things in a long-winded manner.>


Aleri sighed in relief. "Good to know you're both okay." His face immediately turned solemn. "Hold the phone, are you implying that there were people you knew in there?"



Rexial glared at Jack's lifeless body as he removed the sheathe for the Fragarach, using a strip of Jack's shirt to clean the blade before returning it to its place.

Belting it to his hip, the swordsman pondered the possiblities of his use of the weapon... it would completely invert his weaknesses and strengths. He would become immune to all but stab wounds, which he was too fast to be struck with, and blasting attacks would be ineffective, while they were normally the best way to combat him.

"...Sora, are you okay? Well, looks like we've had a successful mission. Are we going home now? I think Al's already gone, since I can't sense him in this world anymore. He's probably taken the two people he was with in the basement back to the House."

<Alright.>

Blake pushed the staff towards Scylla's head, pushing his head into his already slit neck. He reentered his body, and watched as the beast burst into flames. Blake sat down, and caught his breath. The girl, on the other hand, had passed out. Blake picked her up and said,"I can't thank you enough for your help... I'm Blake."

As his demon retreated back into his eye, Junior smiled, "I'm Grim Junior. My red lobster friend here is Mimi." He ducked underneath a wildly swung clothes iron that had STFU engraved in it. After he dodged the first swing, she opted to just punch him.

Junior rubbed his arm, "Ow. Yeah, don't mention her hands or her lack of speech... Both are rather sore subjects... She doesn't really like it when I bring it up..."

Blake was in awe. He said,"Wow, I never thought that I'd meet the Reaper, let alone his son..." He noticed some followers by a gas station. He said to Junior,"I needed a place to hide. You know any hiding places?"

Mimi nodded silently.

Junior shook his head, "No, not Limbo. We'll bring them to the House and talk to Minato... He should let them in..."

Mimi looked down at her feet before opening a portal.

"The flames won't burn you. Just move quick before they notice us... I don't want to have to fight more than I have to." Junior explained.

Blake quickly checked on the heathens, and quickly ran into the flaming portal.

As Minato walked out of the room, Athez followed after him. "I've got the feeling that interesting things are about to happen."